Want to learn how to get your kids to do chores without nagging? Let’s take a look at the basics.I remember being a teenager and hearing my mom ask me several times a day:
Put your clothes away…
Finish making your bed.
Clean up after you eat.
And the list goes on and on and on. I know that part of why I didn’t really do those things is because I grew up with a maid in our house. Yes, a maid.
I grew up in Brazil and it’s just a part of our culture for families who have the means to do so, so moving to the US I had to learn how to clean & organize our house the hard way. With my kids though, I want them to grow up knowing how to take care of their belongings, their space, and everything in their lives, really. To take care and to value it in their hearts.
Not that my mom didn’t teach me that. She absolutely did. Despite the fact that we had A LOT done for us, she always taught us to be kind and value our belongings and to be grateful for what we have. The thing is, for my kids, I want to go beyond that. I want them to also know the practical ways they can appreciate what they have.
I want them to have the life skills necessary to take care of what they own. Without nagging.
But how do we do that?
Let’s take a look at a few things you can do to make it easier.
How to get kids to do chores without nagging
Kids want to spend time doing activities they love, like playing, reading books, listening to music or watching TV. They don’t necessarily want to spend time doing chores. Chores are no fun.
That’s exactly why we should try and do things that will make doing chores a little simpler and more enjoyable for them.
Assess their behavior (in general)
Have your kids been having behavioral problems in general? Have they been nagging about other things? If so, then you might want to get this taken care of before you want them to do chores without complaining.
Finding tricks that work to deal with their behaviors can be hard, but I have just the perfect resource for you if this is the case. It’s a FREE webinar by Positive Parenting Solutions, with Amy McCready. I have watched the webinar and absolutely loved it! I loved it so much that my husband and I started watching the videos in their online program – GOLD membership.
Do it as a family
Doing chores is not fun, but doing things with the people you love is always more fun than doing them by yourself.
Sometimes in our house, we let the boys cook with us, or we do laundry as a family. And they love that! They feel a strong sense of belonging and significance like each child longs for. [Amy teaches about that in her online program and goes even further into detail.]
Teach them exactly how to do it
Just because you know how to your chores well – because you’ve been doing them for over 15 years – it doesn’t mean that your children know how to do them too.
There are a lot of things they just starting to learn in this life. Things that might look extremely simple to us can be actually complicated to them.
So take your time to show them exactly how to get each chore done. Teach them when they’re in a good mood, well fed and rested. That’s when they learn best. Also, take the time to practice with them. Side by side, step by step, over and over again. Until you feel confident they can do it by themselves.
Kids love attention and love to feel appreciated. Instead of rewarding your kids with stickers, candy, or anything material, show them your love.
Rewarding them with material things will train them to expect something in return every time they do a good deed. Instead, show them you appreciate what they did and how good that attitude is.
Also, grant lots of attention to positive behavior, not bad behavior. This will encourage your kids to act in positive ways. Because they know you care. Because they know it feels good.
Make sure the chores are appropriate for their age
If the chores are more advanced than your child’s age, they will feel very frustrated when trying to accomplish it.
Make sure each task you assign them is actually doable for their level. This way, they’re more likely to complete their chore without nagging.
Don’t expect your kids to deliver the same results you would. Not only do people do things in different ways, but also, they’re just learning how to do that chore.
So be realistic and let them do it in their own way.
Make a visual goal
I’m a very visual person and can benefit a lot from images. I think kids are the same way. I created a chore chart for my son and laminated it. This way, he can see all the chores he’s supposed to accomplish every day and can cross them off with a marker or a sticker.
There’s something about crossing items off a list or chart that makes us feel accomplished. And this is exactly how my son feels every single time he adds a sticker to his chart.
I thought I’d share the chart with you in case you think your children will LOVE it as much as he did. To access the chore chart, you can go to our FREE Printable Library and download it from there.
There’s a Pink + Aqua Chore Chart for girls:
And a Navy Blue + Aqua one:
I hope these tips can be helpful to you in finding more peace at getting those chores done with your kids. It can be very frustrating when they don’t listen to us or just don’t help out around the house.
Each one of these steps have been helpful to our family in times of need, especially the free Webinar on How to Get Your Kids to Listen Without Nagging, Reminding or Yelling. It simply finds the root of many different struggles we have with our kids.